I never considered my self a baby person. Seriously, I remember being in high school and at some event all the girls would flock around the babies, and I didn't. It's not that I didn't like babies I just didn't really know what to do with them. I knew how to hold them, how to change a diaper, how to do general baby maintenence, but I didn't get the whole heart tug thing. Honestly, I didn't get the whole heart tug thing until seeing Lu's sonogram picture, then it really kicked in when she was born. It's weird thought I'm still not super attracted to other people's babies. I think part of it is that I haven't been around as friends have had babies, maybe when that happens I will feel the pull. But maybe I am just our own baby kind of person. Or maybe it's that other moms really make me nervous. I always feel like I'll do something wrong!
My guess is that it's more of an issue of knowing. I know Lu. I learned how to hold a newborn when she was born. I learned how to change her tiny diaper (although this took me a little while because Andy changed all her diapers during his paternity leave, what a guy!). I know that she is not as fragile as she seems, that she can be tickled and it will only make her giggle. I can tell when she is grouchy, I can tell when she is happy and feeling adventurous. I know she gets all excited when Andy comes home from work and she pulls on his legs until he picks her up and tickles her on the bed. I remember her learning to lift her head, learning to smile, learning to roll over, learning to crawl. Raising a baby is knowing a little person at their most vulnerable and caring for them. It is seeing all their tiny human accomplishements and wondering at the awesomeness of it all. It has been far more proufound than I thought it would be.
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